Relationship Advice on My Haute magical Wedding

How to Avoid Growing Resentful in Your Relationship

Tue, 25 May 2021 00:00:00 +0000

Growing resentful in your relationship is something that is common amongst people who have been dating for more than a few years. It can be easy to feel like you're being taken advantage of and want something different because of it. However, these slight feelings of resentment can snowball into bigger feelings that cause turmoil in a relationship. Avoid growing resentful in your relationship by following these tips.

Be direct when talking about your needs and expectations for the relationship

Being direct, in general, will increase communication in your relationship by a great deal. Good communication will lead to better understanding of your feelings and a better way of conveying it to your significant other. Being direct when talking about your needs in a relationship is a great way to set a baseline for how you and your partner will treat each other. This baseline will be understood by both of you and help to guide each of you when talking about expectations for the relationship. It might seem childish, but these expectations will keep your relationship out of a lot of trouble.

Recognize that you'll have to compromise sometimes

Compromising is a huge part of being in a relationship. Everyone compromises sometimes for the betterment of the relationship. You might not be the person who always has to compromise but it's important to know how to do it if you need to. Finding a midway point between you and your partner will help the compromise go over better for both people and create understanding in the relationship. It shouldn't always be the same partner compromising in the relationship, at some point both partners will need to make compromises.

Focus on the positive aspects of your relationship, instead of dwelling on annoyances

Focusing your mind on all of the positive things about your relationship instead of the negative ones will leave you feeling happy about your partner, not bitter toward them. If you have an online relationship then it might be easier to focus on your positive conversations and if you're not online dating then you can try to focus on positive memories you've made with your significant other. There's no point in dating if you are always focused on all of the negative things about your relationship. It'll just lead to you resenting your partner and possibly hurting them.

When you become upset with your partner, give yourself time to cool off before discussing it

Giving your partner some time to cool off before discussing any arguments you might have had will give them time to think about everything before actually addressing it. This time could lead to the difference between having an argument and not having one because most people will start to think more clearly and less emotionally during this time. That way, when you both come back together to talk about your argument, both of you can clearly communicate without too many emotions getting in your way. This is easier if you're online dating because you can step away from your phone and computer for a while to cool off.

Practice active listening

Active listening is where one partner actively listens to their partner's point completely and actually takes in what they are saying. This is important to a relationship and avoiding resent because many people don't listen to their partner and will just wait until it's their turn to argue a point instead of actually taking in what their partner is saying. Active listening will save your relationship from many arguments that could be avoided by listening more deeply to what your partner is saying and understanding where they're coming from. After you active listen, then you can make your own point.

Image by Couleur from Pixabay

How to Stop Being Jealous in Your Relationships

Sat, 08 May 2021 00:00:00 +0000

Jealousy is an issue in most relationships. Whether you are the jealous one, your significant other is the jealous partner, or you are both guilty of this, jealousy can stop a relationship before it really gets started. This crippling relationship destroyer is very hard to deal with, especially if you are the jealous type to begin with.

The best way to deal with this is to avoid asking questions early on, or ever. You don't need to know about every significant other or how many partners they have been with. This might be especially hard for couples who met online. Online dating is a tricky endeavor. Many people on these sites are looking for hookups, not relationships. Was your significant other using this platform to find a relationship, or a good time?

Again, don't ask. These details can only set your relationship up for difficulty and possible failure. They are with you now, and that's all that should matter. Make sure you are on the same page with regards to what you are looking for.

Stop comparing yourself to other people

Unfortunately, this is easier said than done for many. There is a reason envy is one of the seven deadly sins. It afflicts many of us. Stop comparing yourself to your significant other's exes or opposite gender friends. Jealousy can manifest itself in several ways, feeling insecure, suspicion, rejection, fear, anger or anxiety can all occur. Being jealous of close guy friends if you're a man does make sense. Men don't typically have close girls as friends who they wouldn't also be interested in romantically. They are often stuck in the friend zone and are hoping it will eventually turn into something more. It won't, the friend zone is a bottomless pit where escape is impossible. You're better off getting back online and trying to find another date there. Those women haven't already made up their minds about you.

Talk to someone about your emotions

Talking to someone about your feelings of jealousy can be very helpful. Men, this is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign you really care about the other person and want to do everything you can to make the relationship work. Even looking inward at your own struggles with jealousy. Talking to a counselor is always an option. If you don't want to pay for someone to talk to, pick a trusted friend to share with. That person will probably benefit from this because they will want to discuss their own insecurities, but are too afraid to share them. You are opening the door for both of you. Open lines of communication with your partner is also crucial. Don't speak to them when angry or emotional, and avoid any accusations. Discuss your fears and insecurities. Again, you don't want or need to know about your partner's dating past. You will find out more than you really want and perseverate even more on these new revelations.

Figure out the underlying causes of your issues

Why are you really jealous in the first place? Has something happened in your relationship that gives you doubt about your partner's dedication? Did something like being cheated on occurred in a past relationship? Do you feel inadequate because you don't believe you measure up? Emotional scars from previous relationship experiences can be hard, but that person wronged you, not your current significant other. If they have, it's probably time to reconsider your relationship anyway. No one should make you feel inadequate. Again, stop comparing yourself to any previous relationships. You will never feel confident in a relationship until you can move past this. Don't ask questions about exes; you really don't need or want to know. Asking someone you really don't know and are just online dating is worse. That's a red flag for a future clinger or emotional drain. Confidence is attractive. Man or woman, you need to at least show an aura of self-confidence. You are good enough for that person, and good enough for yourself. Show it!

Remind yourself of the reasons why you love your partner

If you have been together for a while, whether you met online or not is inconsequential, think back to what created that spark to begin with. You chose this person for a reason, and remember they also chose you. They chose you because you are good enough. Everyone has jealous moments. That's just human nature. The problem comes when you allow that jealousy to consume you and destroy your relationship. Be confident in yourself, share your feelings with your significant other, find someone you trust to confide in, get to the root cause of your jealousy, and don't ask questions you don't really want answers to. You obviously can't handle these answers, which is important to know about yourself.

4 Signs Someone Doesn’t Want a Real Relationship

Sun, 28 Mar 2021 00:00:00 +0000

Look, I get it, online dating is hard, dating in general is hard. The older we get the more seemingly impossible it becomes. It can be frustrating when you have been dating someone for a while and you can't tell if they are ready to take that next step with you.

As must as we want it to, chemistry doesn't make a relationship. It's important to figure this out before it's too late and things get extremely messy. Breakups are painful, which is why it's important to recognize the signs of someone who doesn't want a real relationship.

People are at different times of their lives and not all casual dating is going to lead to a relationship. You and the person you are dating may not be on the same page and they could not be as serious of a person as you when it comes to relationships.

Dating online is intimidating! No one wants to be someone's one-night stand. We all want to be loved... right?

In this article, I am going to share with you 4 ways to tell if someone is not looking for a real relationship with you.

Let's get into it:

1. They don't show up, call, or text when they say they will

When someone is not that interested in you they try to give you signs, not on purpose exactly, but red flags nonetheless. Though, of course we tend to look past those. We make excuses for them. We say "maybe they are just busy right now...or always" when in reality they are straight up ignoring us.

If they constantly stand you up, they never call or text first or return messages, then they probably don't really want to talk to you. If they wanted to, they would. Remember that.

Online dating is scary and at times you'll want to forgive easily because it doesn't feel as serious as knowing someone online. It's still important to remember your worth as a human being and know that someone who truly sees a future with you, will prioritize your needs.

2. They avoid intimate physical touch

Yes, some people are just not the 'touchy' 'feely' type, but I mean come on, this just might be a giveaway. People who are not interested will be more distant, both physically and mentally. They will refrain from being near you and probably won't even look at you much.

Someone who is into will want to be near you all the time and won't be afraid to show their emotions through simple things like holding hands.

3. They aren't interested in one-on-one dates, only group hangouts

If they only want to hang out with you in public places or with a group, they probably consider you as a friend. This means they don't have much interest in getting to know you.

Though, this could also mean they are too shy or nervous to hang out with you alone. Keep in mind that this could be a great indicator that they don't care about learning who you are outside of the relationship you already have with one another.

4. They don't want to talk about the future in specific terms

Alright, brace yourself, this is the big one. Maybe if the dead giveaway.

Someone who wants a future with you will make plans. They will look at every detail possible. If someone doesn't want to talk about it and say "let's just live in the present", run away. I mean, you could give them time if the relationship is a little new, but you have been warned.

If you have been dating for a long time and they still don't want to commit to a future with you or even put a label on it, then this person definitely has different plans in mind.

No matter how easy-going a relationship is, there will always need rules. Some sort of foundation that gives the relationship its worth.

Image by S. Hermann & F. Richter from Pixabay